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Thread: Talking Tennis With the Roast

  1. #71
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    Re: Talking Tennis With the Roast

    WOW! The Roast, you are straight up killing it with views on this Thread. A late, late welcome to becoming the second person to roll into the "TSS 6thou Land Of The Giant Club."

    Good that thing that you came back to the Windy City late, last year. Silly ISIS says that they are ready to come into Italy and take over.

    WTF! I have you to know that those terrorists are illing. Dey dumb arses oughta be chillin!' The nuns are going to beat their arses. Hehehe! I know nuns. They are the best arse kickers on da planet. And Da Big G Up On High Has their six. Holla!

  2. #72
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    Re: Talking Tennis With the Roast

    Quote Originally Posted by the Roast View Post
    Thank you RG, from one playa to anatha.
    Note to Stormcentre, Canadian Cutie Genie B is defiantly the new it girl in the tennis world. She has the looks and the game. She is going to make tons of money. She will be taking on Maria in the Quarterfinals at Melbourne. You don't have to be a tennis fan to enjoy this match.
    Roast, was kickin' it with Caroline the other day! Told her The Roast said hi. She said "hvad snakker du om?" LOL

    By the way, I'm here to give you what you want. I'm finna roast the little bitches that spew vomit.

  3. #73
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    Re: Talking Tennis With the Roast

    Quote Originally Posted by dino da vinci View Post
    That's my tROAST! We will win. We will!

    I was so hoping for this post to be the one where you broke through the ceiling, but I guess that still lies ahead. We know you have a champion's heart and would be willing to die to avoid losing, but you showed a lot of class in the only moment that counts, immediately after the contest.

    God, I love competitors.
    I think I have a mental problem Dino. I always play to win but when I get paired with Derek my intensity gets ratcheted up several notches. On the outside I am smiling a little to put him at ease but inside a storm is raging.
    When I am running late to tennis my wife always tells me to be careful, "Don't speed you'll get a ticket."
    I never get a ticket.
    This time I have a job interview looming where I think I have it, I just have to pass a physical and road test.
    Basically just show up in one piece.
    This evening before I leave she says "Just don't get hurt."
    During the tiebreaker that we would go on to lose Derek and I are trailing 3-2. At this crucial must have point we were chasing the ball all over. Derek crosses in front of me blocking my view of the ball for a split second. He had swung and missed but not touched the ball. The ball is on me in a flash, my instinct is to dive. I miss and crash to the deck on my back. I rise quickly. "Just don't get hurt" the wife said before I left.
    The interview got pushed from Friday to Monday. Why did I dive for that ball?

  4. #74
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    Re: Talking Tennis With the Roast

    Quote Originally Posted by The Shadow View Post
    Roast, was kickin' it with Caroline the other day! Told her The Roast said hi. She said "hvad snakker du om?" LOL

    By the way, I'm here to give you what you want. I'm finna roast the little bitches that spew vomit.
    You really know Caroline?? I have become a big fan. When she was #1 I was not a fan but seeing her struggle and bounce back I am in her corner. I'd love to see her win a Slam. Girl has a lot of heart.

  5. #75
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    Re: Talking Tennis With the Roast

    Quote Originally Posted by the Roast View Post
    You really know Caroline?? I have become a big fan. When she was #1 I was not a fan but seeing her struggle and bounce back I am in her corner. I'd love to see her win a Slam. Girl has a lot of heart.
    I don't "know" her really. She's a fan of my nephew and the Danish national soccer team (he plays for them). And I was getting connected with her people through work. Plus we both speak Danish, of course.

    Yes, she's a tremendous athlete. I was actually working for Ekstra Bladet and sat in the newsroom when she became No. 1; we were following it on monitors.

    That was awesome, yet people didn't like it, as if she cheated her way to the top spot by playing a shitload of tournaments.

    I'm rooting for her too! I hope she gets at least one Grand Slam. Serena on the other hand just legitimately joined the convo with Graf and Martina. Like seriously.

    I wouldn't be shocked to see Serena take a Grand Slam in her mid-thirties. She's not too far from catching Graf.

    No matter what Caroline, Serena or anyone else does, NO ONE beats Graf's 1988. Ever.

  6. #76
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    Re: Talking Tennis With the Roast

    Quote Originally Posted by The Shadow View Post
    I don't "know" her really. She's a fan of my nephew and the Danish national soccer team (he plays for them). And I was getting connected with her people through work. Plus we both speak Danish, of course.

    Yes, she's a tremendous athlete. I was actually working for Ekstra Bladet and sat in the newsroom when she became No. 1; we were following it on monitors.

    That was awesome, yet people didn't like it, as if she cheated her way to the top spot by playing a shitload of tournaments.

    I'm rooting for her too! I hope she gets at least one Grand Slam. Serena on the other hand just legitimately joined the convo with Graf and Martina. Like seriously.

    I wouldn't be shocked to see Serena take a Grand Slam in her mid-thirties. She's not too far from catching Graf.

    No matter what Caroline, Serena or anyone else does, NO ONE beats Graf's 1988. Ever.
    Serena just passed Martina and Evert with 19. Graf at 22 is within reach. I think Serena will pass her within the next two years. When she's at her best no one can beat her. That '88 Steffi Slam will be near impossible to top!

  7. #77
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    Re: Talking Tennis With the Roast

    The Roast has become the second Reader/Poster ever to start a Thread that goes over 7,000 views/hits. Congrats! Holla!

  8. #78
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    Re: Talking Tennis With the Roast

    Quote Originally Posted by Radam G View Post
    The Roast has become the second Reader/Poster ever to start a Thread that goes over 7,000 views/hits. Congrats! Holla!
    Thanks RG. In honor of the milestone I will update my recent court time.
    I started a new job for a bump up in pay and I will still get to hit the yellow ball on a semi regular basis.
    After two weeks of no tennis I returned to the court this past Wednesday. I was surprisingly sharp despite the layoff. Did not get the chance to play with Derek this week. After splitting two sets my partner Pure Chuck and I fell behind 3-0 in the third set. Pure Chuck and I are a formidable team. We both believed we could come back and we did. From 5-3 down we tied the score at 5. The score remained tied until 7-7. Pure Chuck and I broke serve and then served it out to win 9-7. A back from the brink comeback really gets the juices flowing.
    Feel free to share your stories if you have them folks.
    Until then keep your eyes on the ball...

  9. #79
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    Re: Talking Tennis With the Roast

    When I was a high school player in the 80's I had the words DESTRUCT and DESTROY stenciled on my racquet. I loved Hagler, I loved boxing, so I tried to take that kind of intensity out onto the tennis court. At the time it was hard to play in such a rage. Both sports are very cerebral, you can break your opponent down both physically and mentally. I never could find the right balance as a kid. It was hard to keep my mind from racing in big moments because I wanted it so bad. It was everything to me.
    Fast forward 30 years to the current day Roast. Tennis is not my life. Just a hobby you might say. I have a wife, two daughters and a normal life. Three weeks ago I started a new job that is taking up a lot of time with extra hours and new rules and ways of doing things. It is coming along good with the usual ups and downs of a new gig.
    Tennis time is fewer and farther between.
    Tonight I get to the courts really needing to get away from reality.
    Tonight I played like a werewolf dropped into a pack of innocent sheep.
    Outwardly I was smiling and nice, encouraging my partners.
    Inside I was a snarling beast, running everywhere ripping out throats, snapping necks and crushing hopes.
    Modern day DESTRUCT and DESTROY.
    I had to beat up on Derek.
    There was a new guy, young guy, very fast on his feet.
    I love playing new guys, especially young fast ones.
    I hit balls past this guy from every angle. My serve turned him in circles. I could see the look on his face like he didn't know what hit him or which way to turn. At the end of the night he complimented my serve which was kind of like Kovalev's jab from the other night. Just busting you up, keeping you off balance and just getting hit by everything coming after it.
    I gave him a few pointers, he hustled well and really gave his best. I can respect a player like that.

  10. #80
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    Re: Talking Tennis With the Roast

    I wasn't going to write anything about my court time this week. Last week seemed too self serving when I read it back the next day. If I played like a werewolf in a flock of sheep last week this week I played like an avalanche. Unstoppable force crushing everything in its path.
    Two sets into the night I am paired up with Derek. Quickly we are leading 4 games to none. Is this it? The end of the losing streak that goes back to last summer? We drop two games, score now 4-2. The tide is turning. The other players are hitting every ball they can to Derek, avoiding the unstoppable Roast at all costs. This is a tactic I run up against a lot. Try to avoid the monster player and hope the less dangerous player misses his shots. The seventh game is epic. If they win it's 4-3, if we win it's a big lead of 5-2. Derek comes up big and we win the seventh game to lead 5-2.
    This is going against how things go when Derek and I play together. Usually we fall behind, catch up, then lose in heartbreaking fashion. Tonight we are up 5-2. Is this it?
    My heart is pounding. I doubt that Derek knows that we haven't won together for maybe a year. The other players don't know. I assume only I am obsessed with this.
    Match point arrives, I am at the net being avoided and the ball floats helplessly over to Derek. To my sheer joy he puts it away and we win!
    I want to drop to my knees for Christ sake and assume the classic Championship pose but I don't want to appear mental so I simply raise my arms in the victory pose and slap hands with Derek.
    In the post match chat, the other players notice that the Roast in undefeated on the night.
    "Really?" I say. "I'm not really that competitive where I would notice that. I'm just out here to play and have fun."
    They all laugh and spit out their water.
    "Yeah right. You'll probably send out 300 emails tomorrow talking about how great you were!"
    They know me too well.

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