The guy who came up with the nickname, "The Clones Colossus" should be writing books of poetry instead of thinking up catchy nicknames for fighters. That’s because "The Clones Colossus" is one of those names you have to hear twice to believe. And even then, you have to ask for the proper spelling.
"Tell me your name again. You’re who from where?"
The Clones Colossus. It’s the nickname of heavyweight boxer Kevin McBride, who was born in the town of Clones, Ireland back in January, 1973.
That explains the first half of the name.
McBride is 6-foot-7 and 255 pounds. That explains the second half.
If you didn’t know what a colossus is, don’t feel bad. Even a college-educated guy might have to look this one up. I had to.
According to my Daniel Webster, colossus is defined as "1. a statue of gigantic size and proportions; and 2., one that resembles a colossus in size and shape."
Hopefully, McBride is a lot more of the second definition than the first. Statues don’t throw many left hooks or slip right hand leads.
You might not know who McBride is just yet, but you’ll become more familiar with the name and the fighter as the summer wears on. By late-July - if nothing goes wrong - you’ll know where Clones is, how to spell colossus, who Goody Petronelli is and what Kevin McBride looks like.
You’ll also know he’s scheduled to fight former heavyweight champ Mike Tyson on July 31.
By that time, there’s also a good chance you’ll know where the fight is going to be held, because they haven’t told us anything yet. It has to do with Tyson getting a boxing license. He’s not welcome in some of the higher places.
As for McBride, he’s now fighting out of Brockton, Mass., under the careful guidance of Goody Petronelli, who once worked long hours with a tough Brockton kid by the name of Marvin Hagler.
Petronelli said they’re in this fight to win it, not to give Tyson a boost to the next tier in the heavyweight division.
"We’re not taking this fight just to be another guy on Tyson’s record. We’re going in this to win it," Petronelli told the Taunton Gazette. "Kevin knows a win over Mike Tyson will get him a top- 10 ranking and maybe a world title shot down the line."
Maybe. Despite the lofty nickname, McBride hasn’t had colossus success. He’s 31-4-1 with 26 KOs, but he hasn’t beaten anyone you’ve heard of.
Still, it’s those losses by McBride that are allowing Tyson to sleep well in the Arizona heat. In a 10-fight stretch beginning in early 1997 and ending in early 2002, McBride lost four fights, including being stopped in the fifth round by Louis Monaco, a journeyman fighter who is built a little like Tyson.
The Clones Colossus.
Isn’t that a giant breakfast roll?